If you're wondering ..

Why I don't update anymore.. its cos I switched sites! Blogspot gets confusing, and Tumblr makes it so easier to manage my blogs. So bye bye blogspot & hello Tumblr.

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CMN

"If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it doesn't, then it was never meant to be." -Anonymous

No matter how many times we let each other go, we're always back together, it happens every time. & Even though we barely have anything in common, and we butt heads like crazy. There is one thing that we do have in common, we both have maaadfuccken love for each other,<3

A day w/ my King

Yes! My baby came home, finally back to the Oc. Well he comes over today at like 10 in the morning and he got me breakfast! Hes so cuutee(; We just sat there, ate, and watched TV together. & Just like I said in the other blog, I was gonna tax him with my love! And I sure did('= Kekekekee! Then later, we just hung out at my house for a bit til it was 1ish, and we walked over to his house. Then we meant up TimmyLa! Mhmhmh, basically after that I just sat around and I just watched the two boys dance,('=
Today would be the best day. I just spent the whole day bonding with my baby, and I feel so much closer to him. It feels right. It feels like he's really my boyfriend, and I'm his girlfriend. I look at him, and I can't imagine hes the guy that I've been fighting with. The guy I've been arguing with. Being with him it feels so relaxing and peaceful. He just makes me so happy to the fullest extent. Now that I finally got to be with him for the whole day, and I see how much he changed. I feel like there's a completely different connection between us. Not a bad one, but a very good one <3 So so much closer. Calvin Nguyen, you're everything I ever wanted in a guy, and I know we've got something way more than just the 'lil kidz' kind of love.

Definitions

I really think the definition of love is happiness, and the definition of happiness is love. Its like a 2-way kind of thing. You can't have one or the other, its always both. If you're unhappy that isn't love. If you're sad that isn't love. Love is always happiness. Happiness is always love. Love + Happiness = Boy&Girl. I can't think of another way to make it any simpler. I have a new way of looking at things, understanding things, a new mind set. Eventually the make up love, the I'm sorrys are gonna get old. Just eventually. Things can never be the same, things can't just continue working out, things can't keep on going...

"I only go to you for happiness. But you don't make me happy anymore, so whats left?" -Queenie

Tonight

Fucccck, I hate it when hes right. )'= I love getting lectures from mah Daddy, he always finds a thing to make me feel better. Always finding a way to keep on trying, keep on going, & keep on fighting like a soldier. Cos at the end of the day, its all worth it. But how long do I have to keep on fighting? I just want a goddamn brighter day, I hate continuously having these dark nights.

"The greater things in life make the greatest pain. Its love. We need it to survive, yet it hurts us so much. But when it doesn't hurt us, its the greatest feeling of all." - DaddyHJV

Trading spaces

I'll give you what it feels like to be in my shoes, and how it fucken feels like being put second. I always had a jealousy issue. Bitches these days gotta understand, whats mine is mine, not yours. I don't even know who to believe, the bitch who told me or you. You make things even worst when I confront you about it. I just wanna hear those calming words, "Of course not, you're the only girl. Don't you cry, it's gonna be okay." Just those simple words, would just make me feel 10x better. But nope, it turns into a fucken tantrum. Pretty much like how a 4 year old would handle it. Urgh, I really wish the world never invented the the private calling, thing. My life would be so much easier.

"I'd rather trust a woman's instincts, than a man's words." -Unknown.

10 31 08

You give the words "forever" a whole new meaning. & You're the person that's willing to keep that promise. This summer was just a setback, I love you baby. Calvin Minh Nguyen, 9 months & we still got it <3

1 more day

After weeks, long days, & countless hours, of not seeing him, I finally get to see him TOMORRRROOWW. Yay, I can't wait. I'm not gonna say much cos I'm in such a bad mood, I'm super really tired, and I've got terrible stomach cramps. But hopefully after having the nightly phone talks with my baby, he'll make me feel all better & I can go to bed in a good mood. He always finds a way to do it, I don't know how, but he does! Anyways, night night world :)

New POV

For you noobs, POV means point of view! Haha, just kidding. I'm a noob myself, I just learned "POV" on urbandictionary the other day. So today, mhmh. Me & Christy, busted like 10 missions, and we accomplished every single one! One including putting in the mini fridge inside my room. I love my room, it has everything you can think of besides the A/C ];< WELL FINALLY, Christy takes me out for crawfish. It was MHMHH, yummy. Evey thing went well til the check came out. Then we found out we were fucken 2 dollars short. LMAO, I looked at her & shes like panicking and I go fuck it Christy, lets fucken run it. We got up, walked out as if nothing happened, and the moment we past the door. WE RAN TO CARLS JR. Fucken funny shit, it was the highlight of my day. Now that's what you Partner in Crime :) Christy Huynh, all day eveeer'daaay! Well I was thinking, a whole lot lately. About meat and what an animal had to go through just to get on my table. And today I thought about it even more, when I was eating the crawfish. It was just there, on its back all dead. It made me feel so, urgh. I really even could enjoy my meal. It was just so sad, I don't even know why. Then it made me realize all of the other things that I ate, and all of the animals that had to die cos of me. So I Sydnee Queenie Le, will be going vegetarian for the next week & if I can, I wanna go longer. I know how it feels like when you get hurt, maybe not physically but mentally & verbally. So I'm trying to put myself in their little "feet".

Over booked

So this Saturday the 15th. Oh boy oh boy. Why am I so careless about the times? We need more hours in the day, I swear. I have like 3 things going on. And its like really big events that I can not just not attend. So I have Dianna Nguyen Uncle's wedding at 8am, baby's family picnic at 2pm, and then I've got Christy & my kickback at 5. What am I suppose to do? I guess I can't really make it to Dianna Uncle's wedding, but I'll be sure to take her out another day cos I promised her I would come and help out,('= And mhmh. I guess I'm gonna go to the picnic, and come back before 5. And if I'm late, Christy can watch over everything. LMAO, she makes me laugh how she thinks shes the Queen. We all know, I am ('= Isn't that right, Christy? + Ladies who I invited to my kickback, make sure you tell me if you could make it or not, ASAP! Cos so far I have 12 girls. The more the better :)


HyphhyHOANG (7:59:45 PM): HOMEEEEGIRL
HyphhyHOANG (7:59:47 PM): WHATS RONG? =[
^ I love my homeboy. When my status changes from nothing to ")'=", he's always the first to ask/see if I'm okay :)

What I always do

* If you wanna see the bigger version, just drag picture into URL.
& If you have twitter! Follow me; http://twitter.com/ayeequeenie

So babyboy, called me at 2am. We had such a great talk. He likes to sing me songs :) Hes so cute. Just 3 more fucken days until I get to see him after like 2 weeks! On Saturday hes taking me to his family picnic. I'm so scared )'= Lets hope everything things out okay!

I'm just ...

Looking at it, waiting for the words "Calvin Nguyen" go across the screen, because you promised me you would.

T-shirt

I'm sitting here just about to tell you that I wanna end things. Not end, just wanting some space. A little room to breathe for a bit. Yet I come over in my closet, I look inside. I see the t-shirt that you gave me of yours. I put it on, I realized I missed you so much. Whats wrong with me? How come every time I'm about to tell you what I want, you give me that sweet talk of yours, and you turn everything around. "Hes the King of mixed signals, and I'm the Queen of second thoughts." I found that line today, It made me think about you cos its so true. Its one thing now, and another thing next. Just fuck it. Fuck it all. Fuck every thing. Fuck the compromise. Fuck the fighting. Just go with the flow baby. Stop planning out things. Stop saying things, and making promises me can't keep. I know we can't. We never follow through to what we say. Just be happy for what we're doing one day, and stop worrying about the next. We both know we're gonna always love each other no matter what. And I'm so positive that you're the boy that I'm going to marry one day when I'm 34. No kidding. I just wanna kickback and have fun. There's just something about you that makes me fall for you so hard, but the pain you caused me I can't take. But I've fallen hard enough to not even care anymore. Right now, we have no trust in each other. So you know what baby? You've got a long way to go to prove it to me. And so do I. But I know I can earn your trust. I just know it.

Ne-yo

Why did I ever use to hate you? I can admit every time I listen to your songs, it always made me cry cos it made me think of the past. But now, I relate to it so much. Who ever discovered you, is like the greatest person alive. I love your songs. Right now, I'm listening to "A Little Space". I'm gonna write my thoughts in the other blog, not this one ('=

My looks

People always ask me...why do I take so long to get ready? Well here to prove it to you, I gotta go through a lot of steps. And this is just hair & make-up. Image my clothes & body too. So lettttmee break it down for yah- My face. I'm that type of girl that has that white ass pale face, with a brown sparkly bronzer & a touch of blush on my cheeks. I don't do much to my eyes besides that thick black eyeliner cat tail, a little mascara, and just a light peachy eye shadow just to blend it out. My hair, if you ask me If I tease it, I actually don't. I don't even use a comb to do my hair. I just blow dry, and straighten my hair, and I use my hands just to "puff" it up a little, & of course that bobby pin to keep my bangs from getting into my face. And you know girls, a lot of hairspray. Haha, Christy Huynh says I'm the reason why we aren't gonna have an O Zone layer anymore cos of massive usage of hairspray. My lips, as you can see I've got these big nigga lips. I can't work the red lips, but I think I can work the really pinky pink look. I just have this really nice pink lip stick that I use then I go over it in a pink lip gloss. Around my corners of my lips, Its really really red, I have no idea why but its super red. So I take my foundation sponge and I go around it just to cover it up. So yep, that's the "Queenie" face.

Worst

I had the worst phone call with you, Calvin Minh Nguyen. When you come back home, I'm going to tax you so hard, you're gonna regret pissing me off. I'm going to like attack you with so many kisses, you won't even be able to breathe. I'm going to like hug you so tight, you can't even move. I'm going to like pin you down, and I'm going to make you tell me reasons why you love me, and if you don't, I'm going to take you a feather & tickle you till you do. THAT'S HOW MUCH YOU PISSED ME OFF. Tomorrow you better make it all better]:< I really hate today, I really tonight. Writing this out, makes me so relived. The only best conversation I had with you today baby, was when you sang to me.

calvieDAelephant (10:14:43 PM): aye aye shawtyy
calvieDAelephant (10:14:49 PM): put your sweet little thing my waay
QUEENIEsydnee (10:15:18 PM): Why don't you come my way, baby ?
QUEENIEsydnee (10:15:19 PM): ('=
calvieDAelephant (10:15:26 PM): i aintt really tryna spit no game
calvieDAelephant (10:15:30 PM): i just really wanna know yourr namee
calvieDAelephant (10:15:31 PM): (:
QUEENIEsydnee (10:15:39 PM): Oh so thats what you want?
QUEENIEsydnee (10:15:44 PM): I'm Sydnee, but you can call me tonight <3
calvieDAelephant (10:15:48 PM): LMAO
calvieDAelephant (10:15:52 PM): i will babe
^ IM's like this from you, just make my day. We need more of these.

Over all tonight, I just wanted to like talk to you & have those laughs. But we didn't and I got upset. I kept on trying, but you kept on getting mad. After like a half an hour talk. I gave up & so did you. So I'm not gonna even try.. cos I know even though we might be fighting right now, tomorrow it's gonna be fine. Cos we can never stand being mad at each other for long. That's one of the things that I love about us,(';

Why ...

Why do I let you disrespect me, why do I let you call me things I don't wanna be called...? I hate it. Do I ever call you anything other than babyboy, baby, or babe? I don't think so. I call you mean stuff when they're necessary. You call me mean shit, every time you get a chance. Yeah, I know you got your mood swings & your unhappy at times. But can you really not control the words or the names that you say & call me?

DaddyHjv

Today's the day you might leave me for 4 whole months. And I really hope you don't. So there's some things on my mind I would like to tell you before you go. Just in case. You're literary my favorite-est person in the whole wide world. You're always there for me when I need you most. Basically your there for me when I'm in need of, anything. You always look out for me, and you're the type of person that I can always count on. Even down to the tiny little things, I can count on you. When I'm lost, you're there for me. When I've got nothing to do, your always there to me out. When I'm sick of my songs, you're always there to tell me new ones. & when I'm about to do something I'm not suppose to do, you always pop up in my mind telling me, "to be a good girl." Kekkekeee. You're gonna always be my big strong Daddy, and I'm gonna always be your little "babii", no matter what. ('= Now that's a promise, I'm willing to keep. So Daddy, if you really end up leaving me. I'm going to really really miss you. You have no idea.

Surprise!

I HAD THE BEST SLEEEP EVVVVEER, last night. I didn't wake up in the the middle night, and I slept past 8:30am, for like the first time this week ('; I guess my stress level went down a bunch and there hasn't really been anything on my mind. So that's probably the main reason why I can sleep now. But my gay ass big brother Tino, wakes me up like half an hour ago, around 10 and told me to come outside. I go outside and I see a new car. He just bought a new Honda Accord, its a old car though but it's still new cos we just bought it. If that make sense. He said he's going to drive that car only to work and his Acura TL, is going to be his weekend car. I heard him saying it has to do something with the miles or whatevs. He pinky promised me if I'm going to be good girl, which isn't that hard for me to do, he's going to give me this car in the next couple of years. Its gonna be my first car ('= So all of those plans of me saving up birthday, Chinese new years, & Christmas money to buy my car are long gone! So its good bye 1997 Honda Civic , and hello 2000 Honda Accord! Did I mention, this summer was the best summer I ever had? If I haven't, I'm gonna say it now. HAHA.

Body kit, rims, eveeeeerr'thaang. You sexy beast =));

10:49pm, Mi lovee.

I just had a great talk with you baby ('= Even when he tells me he isn't gonna call me as a punishment cos I kept on complaining. He still does it just to make me happy. ('; In just the next 4 minutes, that 8 days is going to turn into 7. Just another day less I have to wait. & Pfft. I'm so not being a loser and counting down all of the days til your coming home ... okay so maybe I told a little lie! But who hasn't? I've never ever been so excited, ever!
I know we're going to have days where we don't wanna talk to each other. I know one day I'm going to give you the silent treatment. I know one day, you're not gonna call me when you actually tell me you're not gonna call me. I know those days are gonna come. It might not be soon, cos I really hope it doesn't. But I know it will. But you know what? I think I'm going to actually suck it up. Because it doesn't matter if you're not gonna talk to me for a day. It doesn't matter if you don't talk to me for 2 hours, or even 2 seconds. I'll always be happy, because baby- I have my whole life to talk to you, I have my whole life to be with you, <3